


If you're still bleeding you are the lucky ones

by littlelooneyluna



Category: Emmerdale, robron
Genre: Grief, Heartache, Holly's death aftermath, M/M, Rip Holly, Robert showing his caring and loving side
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-30
Updated: 2016-09-30
Packaged: 2018-08-18 18:35:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8171740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlelooneyluna/pseuds/littlelooneyluna
Summary: 'It started with the casserole. The soft smile and the delicate hands as he walked past Aaron and asked Diane if it was too hot to hold without a towel.' - Aaron notices a certain softness in Robert after Holly's death and is overwhelmed by it all.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to get something out regarding Holly's untimely death (still in shock, still sobbing) and this came to mind. I know it focuses on robron rather than Holly's death but I just got carried away with myself when I saw Robert being all sweet and carrying in the casserole. It made me want to write about how soft and gentle he has become and how Aaron has noticed. Anyways let me know what you think! 
> 
> Title; Youth (Daughter)

It started with the casserole. The soft smile and the delicate hands as he walked past Aaron and asked Diane if it was too hot to hold without a towel. He didn't think Aaron would have noticed how carefully he held it to the car and then as he walked all the way up to the farm, Aaron did though. Of course he did, of course he saw how gentle Robert seemed to be as he reached out for Aaron's hand to stop him from driving to Butler's, pointing out that he must be: "Too tired to be driving anywhere." And with a soft smile adding a, "Let me drive instead."

Aaron noticed it all and it was incredibly inviting when he realised how observant he was of his boyfriend. He couldn't help but link his hand into Robert's as they sat by the table at Butler's, the room was quiet and settled as they both heard the sound of sniffles travel into the room. That's when Aaron saw it.

Robert had been staring at him and it seemed like a different sort of look. There wasn't lust there, although they both had missed that _terribly_ whilst Aaron was away. Instead there was some sort of desperate love there, this need to tell Aaron in some silent way all that he was feeling inside. The look said:  _I missed you so much, don't ever leave me like that again Aaron because I could have lost you so easily, from one day to the next. I was scared last night without you, without you next to me after what happened..._

  
It made Aaron catch his breath because he was sure Robert had tears in his eyes then.

  
It was mad to think about how softer Robert appeared, he had been so kind with Victoria as they stood in the kitchen, he wouldn't let the arm dropping down her neck move once as she stood there speaking quietly to him. Aaron had _seen_ then as well, he had seen how this once cocky and arrogant man had almost melted into _this_ , what he was _now_ \- a loving, gentle boyfriend and brother.

Aaron always knew it was there, under the surface, the rocky edgy harsh one that concealed this bubble of loving _goo_ that was always threatening to spill over but also so tightly locked away. It didn't need to be locked away now, not anymore.

  
Aaron smiled, a little shy one as he squeezed back Robert's hand, "I know."

It was let out in a whisper that was nearly forgotten because Victoria entered the room. If Robert hadn't lifted his head and wiped at his eyes and then gave Aaron the faintest wink, Aaron wouldn't have known just how much it all meant to Robert.

 

*

 

Aaron saw even more of the softness when he watched Robert watch him with Liv. He had felt Liv rush into his arms as soon as they got back to the pub and he had cradled her like she was a baby, before letting go and playing with the ponytail she was sporting like always. His eyes had flickered to Robert and he had seen it again, a warmness about the older man that was so much more prominent than before he was jetting off to France. There were tears in his eyes again and Aaron reflected it almost instantly as their eyes locked and they smiled at each other weakly, able to communicate just with looks now that said _I was the same with Vic before we left the farm, I understand._ It was comforting as Aaron titled his head and said _Thank you,_ without a sound leaving his lips.

 

*

 

It was when they were in bed that night when Aaron was able to feel almost overwhelmed with the subtle delicateness of Robert, the soft fingers brushing against his back and then the light kisses that trailed up and down Aaron's neck as they lay there.

  
Aaron turned to face Robert, a sleepy smile on his face that made Robert raise an eyebrow and say, "What?"

  
Aaron shrugged his shoulders and then placed a hand on Robert's check tenderly, "You were amazing today," Aaron had never been so honest in his words, he meant it all after seeing how gentle and loving Robert had been, he didn't want to sound too surprised in his words and suddenly he was shaking his head and leaning a little closer. "I mean, I knew you would be."

  
Robert looked away timidly, his eyes fluttering as he dared to look up again and see Aaron's face, "We both have to be there for them don't we? Vic and Adam need us _both_. They need _us_."

  
Aaron nodded and then bit down on his lip, " _I_ need you," he whispered out slowly, arms stretching out so that he was holding Robert even closer.

  
Robert kissed down on Aaron's head, "You've got me." He whispered back with a little smile. "Just don't go running off to France again, I didn't like that all that much."

  
Aaron looked up at Robert, letting out a small smile that was teasing him until he realised that the older man looked like he was about to start crying.

  
"Hey, hey come here." Aaron found his arms around Robert immediately, pulling him into this makeshift position that meant that Robert was into his chest, shaking a little as he tried not to cry.

  
Robert pulled away, feeling a fool for getting so overwhelmed by this all. He didn't overtly care about Holly, but he cared about Victoria and to an extent Adam and Moira. It had shaken him, to think how quickly someone could be taken like that and Robert could help think back to how scared he was last night after he had rang Aaron and he was in the empty bed, clinging onto the sheets and not being able to stop thinking about how far away Aaron was. How easily he could be taken from him despite knowing that Holly's death wasn't by chance, he knew it was drug related and not some freak accident. It didn't lessen the worry though, nothing could.

  
"It just scares me, how fast - I mean, _fuck_ she just, I just kept thinking 'what if it had been Vic or _you_ ' and I -" Robert blurted out the words as he looked at Aaron and saw that the younger man was crying now, "Aaron - I didn't want to make you upset."

  
Aaron shook his head, a hand reaching out to fall on Robert's chest. "I love you," it rolled off the tongue, it was effortless and true and all that Robert wanted to hear, _needed_ to hear.

  
Robert sighed out shakily as he pushed their foreheads together, "We're so lucky Aaron, I'm not taking us for granted - I feel like I do sometimes and, and I -"

  
"We both do, we're both idiots sometimes but we work don't we?" Aaron titled his head and kissed Robert's check as they settled back down on the bed again. "I like seeing the soft and gentle side of ya Rob..." It was whispered as Aaron rested his head into Robert's.

  
"You mean the awkward bloke who can't do anything but give out casserole like a twat and not let his sister out of his sight."

  
Aaron slapped a hand down on Robert's chest, "Enough of that, I said you were great and I _meant_ it Rob." Robert looked unconvinced. "I _really_ meant it." Aaron added with a gentle smile that made Robert relax.

  
"I love you too Aaron," it was said after a few minutes of nothingness, it filled the air with a bright light that had been taken away the minute Holly had died. "Promise me we'll always be like this, _happy_ , not taking anything for granted 'cos life...it's too short for that."

  
Aaron felt Robert's arms around him tightly, his fingers lightly stroking at Robert's hands as he whispered back, "Promise." because he didn't need to give it a second thought.

 


End file.
